Post by NewCanteberry on Feb 18, 2005 18:29:47 GMT -5
I have been fortunate enough to be born into a Christian home and have gone to church literally all my life. I accepted the Lord sometime around the age of five, and because it was at such an early age, I only remember the event itself, not the time or place or circumstances.
Despite coming to the Lord at an early age, I really did not experience much spiritual growth, or even understand what it meant to be a believer until some years later. About the time I began to really grow spiritually, I was attacked with a wave of doubts concerning the reality of my faith. For several years during junior high I battled with myself mentally over this issue, and the result was a firm conviction that the God and teachings of the Bible are real and the only way to live a life that is fulfilling and fruitful is through following this God and his teachings.
Another thing that occurred while I was in Junior High that had a great impact on me was the terrorist attack of 9-11. I had always considered going into the military, shortly after this attack, I was determined to make a career fighting for my country.
During my sophomore year of high school, God began to truly move me. The first thing that occurred was that I began to struggle with justifying my desire to serve in our nations armed forces with the biblical idea of leaving revenge to God. I began to feel I was mainly motivated out of a desire for revenge. Another, and more impactful question also occurred to me: what was I fighting for? I began to realize that the soldiers on the front were not saving anyone, that was our job as believers here at home, they were merely buying us time.
I only came to this realization however, after God decided to make a massive and sudden change in me.
One Sunday morning, our church put on a pastor appreciation lunch after the service. Sometime during that ceremony, something seemed to say, “I want you to become a pastor.”
The next morning when I woke up bright and early for school, that same feeling was there, telling me to become a pastor. I found this rather odd, it was nothing I had even ever considered seriously before. I spent most of my day pondering this feeling, and by the end of it was totally convinced it was of God.
I then did the thing most people do when confronted by a huge change with God. I tried to talk my way out of it. When that didn’t seem to work, I tried to negotiate, working out my own compromise that would allow me to serve my country and my God at the same time, or so I thought.
The next day (Wednesday now), the feeling was gone. I shrugged this off, content to go on with life, pursuing my new “compromise.” That afternoon, the though struck me to look at an online database of colleges our school had given us and try to find some that I could study religion or theology at while on an NROTC scholarship (I had chosen at this point to go Navy because during periods of shore duty there would be plenty of time to pursue a seminary degree in theology or the such). I was amazed to discover no such school existed. My plan was dead before it started.
That night at our youth group, our youth pastor gave a sermon on spiritual apathy, not listening to God’s will, etc. It hit me exactly where I needed to be hit. In about fifteen minutes time I felt like I had been crushed and started over, to use the potter and clay analogy. I sat for literally a half hour trembling uncontrolably.
I am now totally convinced that God is calling me to serve him professionally in the role of a pastor.
Since then, God has been showing me a lot of things. One thing I have learned is to look at school (which I absolutely loathe) as a missions field. I had fought this for along time, and again God has used a sermon from another pastor to break me (this actually occurred last night). So if y'all would pray for me know, that I would have God would give me opporunities to minster to my peers at school, the discernment to recognize those opportunities, and the courage and wisdom to use them.
Despite coming to the Lord at an early age, I really did not experience much spiritual growth, or even understand what it meant to be a believer until some years later. About the time I began to really grow spiritually, I was attacked with a wave of doubts concerning the reality of my faith. For several years during junior high I battled with myself mentally over this issue, and the result was a firm conviction that the God and teachings of the Bible are real and the only way to live a life that is fulfilling and fruitful is through following this God and his teachings.
Another thing that occurred while I was in Junior High that had a great impact on me was the terrorist attack of 9-11. I had always considered going into the military, shortly after this attack, I was determined to make a career fighting for my country.
During my sophomore year of high school, God began to truly move me. The first thing that occurred was that I began to struggle with justifying my desire to serve in our nations armed forces with the biblical idea of leaving revenge to God. I began to feel I was mainly motivated out of a desire for revenge. Another, and more impactful question also occurred to me: what was I fighting for? I began to realize that the soldiers on the front were not saving anyone, that was our job as believers here at home, they were merely buying us time.
I only came to this realization however, after God decided to make a massive and sudden change in me.
One Sunday morning, our church put on a pastor appreciation lunch after the service. Sometime during that ceremony, something seemed to say, “I want you to become a pastor.”
The next morning when I woke up bright and early for school, that same feeling was there, telling me to become a pastor. I found this rather odd, it was nothing I had even ever considered seriously before. I spent most of my day pondering this feeling, and by the end of it was totally convinced it was of God.
I then did the thing most people do when confronted by a huge change with God. I tried to talk my way out of it. When that didn’t seem to work, I tried to negotiate, working out my own compromise that would allow me to serve my country and my God at the same time, or so I thought.
The next day (Wednesday now), the feeling was gone. I shrugged this off, content to go on with life, pursuing my new “compromise.” That afternoon, the though struck me to look at an online database of colleges our school had given us and try to find some that I could study religion or theology at while on an NROTC scholarship (I had chosen at this point to go Navy because during periods of shore duty there would be plenty of time to pursue a seminary degree in theology or the such). I was amazed to discover no such school existed. My plan was dead before it started.
That night at our youth group, our youth pastor gave a sermon on spiritual apathy, not listening to God’s will, etc. It hit me exactly where I needed to be hit. In about fifteen minutes time I felt like I had been crushed and started over, to use the potter and clay analogy. I sat for literally a half hour trembling uncontrolably.
I am now totally convinced that God is calling me to serve him professionally in the role of a pastor.
Since then, God has been showing me a lot of things. One thing I have learned is to look at school (which I absolutely loathe) as a missions field. I had fought this for along time, and again God has used a sermon from another pastor to break me (this actually occurred last night). So if y'all would pray for me know, that I would have God would give me opporunities to minster to my peers at school, the discernment to recognize those opportunities, and the courage and wisdom to use them.
